Do you want to develop your skills in observation, planning,
assessing and implementing your relationship work? Why not develop your skills in our courses of
increasing complexity? And ... here's
the final exam.
Few people can clearly answer the question, "What do you want?
" Many people are so entangled in emotions, beliefs and relationships
that they cannot focus on specific goals. In this first segment of our systemic
training you learn to recognize many types of relationship
issues and how to start assessing and clarifying relationships.
After clarification, most people can better discuss their goals,
and plans for achieving their goals. For a few people, this is all they
need to move ahead in their lives. For others, our systemic
psychology provides a summary of which relationships need what attention. This forms a basis for a relationship coaching plan. And our systemic
diagnosis can show you when you would be wise to refer people to other professionals.
On Systems 1 training, you observe and discuss many demonstrations
of real relationship work, and you can exercise with other participants
to build your experience as both a client and a coach:
- Relationship theories and systemic realities
- How to stay resourceful in difficult relationships
- How to recognize
emotional incest and
- How success, health and relationships are interconnected
- How to select exercise partners for homework assignments
- How relationships evolve in a hierarchy of relationship types
- How to create and interpret a relationship matrix (family map)
- How to recognize relationship transferences
- How to use relationship diagnosis to create
relationship coaching plans
- How to help people clarify relationships with
living, missing and dead people
Anybody whose calling is to guide souls
should have his own soul guided first,
to know what it means to deal with
the human soul. Knowing your own darkness
is the best foundation for dealing
with the darkness of other people.
Few people know what they want. People more
often know what they don't want, or what they should want, or have
some abstraction (e.g. happiness) as a goal. Many people resist or object
to their own goals, and describe conflicts about achieving their goals.
If your work is goal-directed, then you need ways to help people
specify congruent goals (all parts of a
person want those goals).
Systems 2 training offers you proven ways to help people use
their conscious and unconscious resources to make effective
plans for achieving their goals. You can observe many demonstrations
concerning problematic goals, and you can practice with other participants
to develop your skills:
- How to deal with criticism
- How to respond to abstract goals
- How to respond to negative goals
- How to respond to conflicting goals
- How to respond to manipulative goals
- How to respond to philosophical goals
- How to respond to spontaneous trance
- How to deal with compliments and flattery
- How to change "Yes-but" objections in ordinary conversation
- How to change "Yes-No" objections (simultaneous incongruence)
Many people are unable to answer questions about
life goals without going into trance-like states. (We
don't use trance inductions in systemic psychology ... we don't need to).
Systems 3 training explores how to find life
goals and how to continue goalwork in dreams or trance. You will observe
many demonstrations with real issues, and you will practice with other
participants to build your experience:
- How to recognize identity loss
- How and when to use mini-metaphors
- How to change reality using isomorphic metaphors
- How to recognize identity conflict (complex conflict)
- How to recognize and respond to spontaneous trance
- How to start and continue interactive metaphors
- How to coach people to end nightmares or recurring bad dreams
- How to create isomorphic interactive metaphors to identify resistance
- How to coach a person to experience integrity (the Soul of Soul Work)
- How to recognize ecstatic and transcendental states of consciousness
Systems 4: Abuse,
Trauma & Motivation
Many people who cannot define or achieve their goals are blocked by
unresolved and often forgotten trauma. Until these issues are managed, these
people may act childishly in situations requiring maturity. They will likely
sabotage themselves, have unhealthy relationships and avoid developing.
People who have badly damaged their inner selves are vulnerable to
infections ... to corruptions that start with a loss of personal identity.
We outline identifications, identity conflict and lost identity
in Systems 4, although we teach these issues in
The consequences of trauma and
PTSD may be contextual, (e.g. a compulsion or a phobia) or existential
(all of life). Trauma also creates relationship bonds (Systems 5)
or identity issues (Systems 6).
Attempts to manage trauma without resolving identity issues and relationship
bonds may only provide short-term benefits.
- The stages of crisis
- How to prepare for future unpleasant events
- How to transform negative emotions into motivation
- How to change trauma about disease and health issues
- How to coach people to make friends with parts of themselves
- How to help people recover lost or hidden resources - for the long-term
- How to recognize the consequences of abuse, crisis and emotional trauma
Systems 4 was another fine piece of the
complex and comprehensive system of your training.
I hope that Soul Work
develops and spreads, so that it can help people to fulfill their lives.
Professor Martin Šmid, (PhD, Czech Republic)
Many people feel compelled to repeat actions that they would
prefer to avoid. Compulsions and obsessions often reflect
- deep beliefs that pervade all parts of life. In Soulwork 5 you can
explore how compulsions and obsessions work as you learn
how to solve this type of relationship problem.
(Relationship bonds may be called demons by esoteric
and medieval authorities.)
In Systems 5 systemic training you can learn:
- How to recognize relationship bonds
- How to differentiate between relationship
- How to limit the consequences of relationship bonds
- How to replace toxic bonds with peaceful self-esteem, freedom and love
- How to coach people to identify the consequences of bonded relationships
Toxic relationship bonds loss may have been diagnosed as mental
health disorders. After relationship bonds are resolved, our systemic
coaching addresses issues of identity. Together, Systems 4, 5
and 6 training offers a complete system for resolving relationship problems, negative emotions and self-sabotage.
Systems 5 was fantastic! I didn't believe that
relationship bonds were real until I
found and replaced some of my own bonds during this excellent training. Please make
these coaching skills available to other professionals. Academy Director,
Systems 6: Lost Identity, Identifications & Identity Conflict
If people have existential (all of life) resistance against
lasting happiness; then endless encouragement or goal coaching cannot
help them enjoy meaningful lives. This training segment is about
people who have lost themselves
(identity loss), who have
identified with others
(identification) or who have
chronic complex conflict (identity conflict).
Systemic disturbances may be contextual (triggered by
some internal or external event) or existential (all of life). Identity
loss is associated with negative emotions, or the lack of emotions.
These disturbances are often formed during a family crisis in childhood,
although the consequences may remain dormant until adolescence.
In Systems 6
training you can
learn how to explore the varieties of identity
loss and effective ways to restore personal integrity. You will observe many
demonstrations with real issues, and you will practice with others to
build your experience:
- How to coach people to recover Lost Identity (chronic dissociation)
- How to coach people to end Hero Identification (chronic fear or anxiety)
- How to coach people to end Victim Identification (chronic anger or rage)
- How to coach people to end Dead Person Identification (chronic sadness)
- How to coach people to end complex conflict (cannot resolve by goal
Extreme identity loss may be diagnosed as mental
disorders. After identity loss is resolved, we address
relationship bonds and then emotional trauma. Together, Systems 4, 5
and 6, offer complete resolution for many relationship problems
that cause self-sabotage. About 20-25% of Europeans and Americans seem
to suffer from chronic identity loss.
Inspiration & Mentorship
You can learn how to evaluate and replace toxic role models and mentors.
Help people choose inspirational mentors in all parts of life. Learn
how to model and duplicate expert behavior, focusing on problem solving
techniques. Learn how to coach people to build and fine-tune life-fulfilling
Systems 7 includes ways to change the consequences of inappropriate
mentorship from cults and cult-like organizations (see
Exit Coaching), incompetent
therapists and (often) well-meaning authorities.
- How to discuss solutions for
- How to start a systemic coaching practice - private or online
- How to expert modeling of conscious
and unconscious strategies
- How to recognize therapy damage
and coach people to change it
- How to compare and improve unconscious strategies (expert modeling)
Conjoint (simultaneous) counseling is the start of true systemic work.
And, as the consequences of individual changes can disturb a partner,
couple counseling is a wonderful way to complete individual changework.
Coach couples and partners to solve whatever prevents them from solving their
problems! Coach partners to coach each other! Coach couples to manage emotions
and solve problems. Help couples change single and double transferences
(mistaking each other for someone else) and
projections (pretending to be someone else).
You can coach couples to prepare for committed partnership,
end relationship damage and, sometimes, coach couples to separate peacefully.
Systems 8 training includes:
- How to avoid triangulation
- How to set homework for couples
- How to prepare for couple counseling
- How to build and maintain trust with both partners
- How to quickly uncover core couple partnership issues
- How to manage transferences and core transference loops
- How and when to provide individual coaching to one partner
- How to coach people through peaceful separation or divorce
Your Next Step
. Systems 9 - Family Coaching
. Systems 10 - Team Coaching
Online Life Coaching,
Relationship Counseling & Mentorship
Plagiarism is theft. Copyright © Martyn Carruthers
All rights reserved.