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Soul Work for Soul Mates
Spiritual Coaching for Couples Martyn Carruthers

Online Life Coaching, Counseling & Soulwork Therapy

We help people to manage negative emotions
and to solve family and relationship problems.

Couple Coaching for Lasting Happiness

We help people live lives that make sense. We offer proactive and dynamic ways to manage emotional issues and solve relationship problems. We offer couples ways to clarify their relationships, to manage their emotions and to solve relationship problems.

As spiritual beings you can choose to share human experiences - you can choose to be Soul Mates. You and your partner can choose to remember who you really are, and what you can accomplish together in this life.

You can learn to live together consciously. You can determine your spiritual paths, how to proceed on your spiritual journey, and how to deal with any negative events that occur. You can both manage your feelings, needs and desires.

You and your partner can relate as human beings within a happy and healthy partnership. You and your partner can, powerfully and authentically, fulfill yourselves while helping each other manage resistance, conflicts and old habits.

Sometimes, people seek soul mates to fulfill earlier relationships - examples include people who were once twins, and the twin died in the womb; or people who seek a missing or aborted sibling. (You need not be told about these missing people - more likely you sense that someone important is missing, and you seek that missing person).

Living as soul mates means living with responsibility and integrity, not codependence. It means resolving entanglements and conflicts so that you and your partner can fully participate in life together.

Premarital Coaching . Abortions . Vanishing Twins

Couples can dramatically improve their relationships by dealing with issues - not by hiding problems or ignoring conflicts. We help partners to peacefully manage past, present and even future conflicts.

Maturity, Spirituality & Relationships

We proclaim our maturity in our every communication. Physical maturity comes with aging, while mental maturity needs role models and experience. Spiritual maturity represents wisdom and empathy.

We can keep on our spiritual paths and step towards our highest purpose. We can create lives that reflect our spirits, and choose accountability, clarity and inspiration.

Mature people are not easily offended. They are generally calm, eager to learn and humble about their accomplishments. We expect immature adults to proclaim their ignorance loudly, and to communicate with arrogance.

An example of an immature relationship is codependence. Consider the consequences of codependence:

Consequences of Codependence

  • avoids responsibilities
  • abuse or neglect children
  • feel hopeless or worthless
  • feel lethargic or low energy
  • feel withdrawn and isolated
  • psychosomatic symptoms
  • consider self-harm or suicide
  • addictions to alcohol or drugs
  • eating and sleeping disorders
  • become aggressive and violent

Relationship Goals

Although each of you may know what you want quite well, you may both be less aware of your partner's wishes. You may assume you agree on certain points. Then, if some unstated wishes are not fulfilled, a disappointed partner may react with anger, anxiety, depression or withdrawal. (This is most likely when one partner believes that he fulfilled his obligations but that the other did not.) See Couple Contracts.

  • Together explore both contracts, and find conflicts
  • Resolve those conflicts and integrate your wishes

Spiritual Life Counseling

Our couple counseling encourages and challenges partners to move forward and realize their purpose in life, while creating a warm, compassionate experience of committed partnership and possibly parenthood. We can coach you to find your goals, identify your resistances, and assess your spiritual progress.

Our coaching and counseling do not compete with nor replace religious guidance that is available from organized religions. We can help couples :

  • Express love with integrity
  • Accept and resolve conflicts
  • Build spirituality in everyday life
  • Develop authentic relationships
  • Expose and change transferences
  • Consciously connect bodies, minds and spirits

We can help you both stay clear and active towards creating and fulfilling a partnership of your dreams ... one step at a time. Becoming soul mates is possible - yet rarely as easy as the more normal partnerships that surround you.

Spiritual Development . Spirituality for Families . Is Soulwork "New Age"?

How do you start?

To begin our couple counseling, you and your partner should both want to better understand each other as a basis for your lasting happiness. Other steps are:

  •  manage negative emotions 
  •  expose and resolve conflicts
  •  develop creativity and flexibility
  •  expose and clarify transferences
  •  personally commit to clear relationships

Do you want to manage negative emotions and solve relationship issues?

Online Coaching, Relationship Counseling & Systemic Therapy

I thought you were just another therapist - but you were not just. Not even. Not only.

Plagiarism is theft. Copyright Martyn Carruthers 2004-2018
All rights reserved

If you like our work, please link to us. If you know someone who might benefit,
please mention or

For online help, email us at:

Soulwork systemic coaching in America & Hawaii


Soulwork systemic coaching in England, Wales & Scotland

Soulwork systemic coaching in Croatia & Serbia

Soulwork systemic coaching in Poland



Have You Suffered Enough?

 Where are you now? Understand your emotions, fixations and enmeshments
What do you hope for? Know your goals and stop sabotaging yourself
Do you feel resourceful? Learn to develop your inner resources
Do emotions block you? Relationship problems and mentor damage
Do your beliefs limit you? Change limiting beliefs and end dependence
Do you feel connected? Resolve identity issues to recover lost resources
Is your partner happy? Build healthy partnership (or separate peacefully)
Are your children healthy? Happy parents better manage family problems
Do you want team success? Team leaders and their teams develop together
Do you have complex goals? Specialty coaching, counseling & therapy

Plagiarism is theft. Copyright Martyn Carruthers 1996-2018  All rights reserved. Soulwork Systemic Coaching was primarily developed by Martyn Carruthers to help people solve emotional problems and relationship conflicts to achieve their goals. These concepts and strategies are for general knowledge only. Consult a physician about medical conditions and before changing medical treatment. Don't steal intellectual property ... get permission to post, publish or teach Martyn's work - email