As young adulthood ends, many people worry about their unfulfilled
goals and aging bodies. They may feel trapped with a sense that
time is running out. They may describe inner
chaos and a feeling that they must do something extreme
to regain their sanity, passion and sense of control.
We can help you evaluate your life and tame your demons.
We can help you improve your relationships and define new goals.
Solutions for Middle Age Crisis (Temporary Insanity)
The children are growing up and retirement is on the horizon.
For some people, this part of life's journey can be a time of
despair, a time of disillusionment,
emotional breakdown and
depression ... and
some people make terrible decisions.
Sooner or later, you will find yourself
facing a significant transition or major life decision. Some people
call this transition a dark night of the soul.
Your article on midlife crisis shocked me.
I thought that my problems were unique.
While I was happy to find you, I was disappointed that my sense of doom was
rather common and that you knew me so well, having never met me before.
During middle age, most people re-evaluate
their lives and review their ambitions. They may question their
accomplishments and contemplate the approach of their own deaths.
They check whether or not they are content and they often compare
what was previously important with what they want now.
You called it temporary insanity and
you weren't joking! I thought a mid life crisis was a joke, but I spent the last
few months on the edge of a nervous breakdown, with inner demons urging me to
leave my family, my work and even my country. Austria
This crisis may be intensified by an
empty nest, referring to the loneliness that many
parents feel when a last or only child leaves home. The
role of parent to children is nearly over, and the
role of grand-parent has not yet started.
- Do you seek inner peace?
- Do you want to feel effective?
- Do you long for more adventure?
- Do you yearn to feel in love again?
- Do you want to regain your
- Do you want to feel passion instead of
If you find yourself saying "Yes! Yes! Yes!", you may be
feeling dissatisfied with your life, your age and your achievements. This is a
dangerous time if you respond with despair and anger, or if you make hasty
I was lost in strong
emotions, strange ideas, weird theories and peculiar beliefs.
I acted like a mid-life teenager and made some very bad
decisions that I
deeply regret. Thanks for helping me put my life in order so
that I can move on.
Common Reactions to Mid Life Crisis
- Taking financial risks
- Becoming a sex addict
- Starting dangerous sports
- Leaving a partner or family
- Leaving stable work to travel abroad
I have most of what I wanted.
I have a wonderful partner and great children. Yet I was
considering leaving my family, to travel abroad to some unknown place where
some mysterious soul mate might be waiting for me.
Thanks for helping me.
If parts of you feel dissatisfied, confused or discontent,
we can coach you to integrate your parts ... and their resources. We can
help you integrate your passions into your life, and make the changes that you
There are reasons people feel confused and
discontent during middle-age:
- You realize that old age and inevitable death are approaching.
- Your life may have become a set of routines that you do not enjoy.
- The distractions that you liked when you
were younger are no longer fun.
- You cannot answer questions like, "What is my life for?
or What is my legacy?"
We can help you manage negative emotions, solve relationship problems and end
bad habits. We can help you change enmeshments. We can take time to understand you, and
help you find your emotional freedom and rebuild your sense of life.
Do you want to change your
habits and build a happier life?
We can support you every step of your way.
Put a Mid-Life Crisis Behind You
Have you lost your dreams? Do you feel despair? Do you feel alone? We can
- Discover what makes you happy now.
- Assess your
values, strengths and beliefs.
- Evaluate your priorities and balance your life.
- Know your goals and build a vision for
what you want.
I had a conflict about whether to stay with
my family or to freely travel around the world. I was elated when you helped
me sort that out, but then I felt huge sadness for my lost youth and huge
anger for wasting time feeling sad! Frankfurt, Germany
Do you want to start life again? Do you have good ideas,
but you procrastinate or sabotage yourself? We can help you keep your
goals and plans alive ... and create new goals ... and achieve them.
From Midlife Crisis to Peaceful Maturity
A Midlife Crisis is often a period of
dramatic self-doubt during middle age. It may
occur as people sense the passing of their youthful energy, and
feel the reality of approaching old age. During this period, middle aged adults may
become predictably unpredictable.
The "9" years can be particularly dangerous! Ages
(and especially birthdays) of 29, 39, 49 and 59
symbolize life changes, and may trigger suffering and depression instead
of pleasure and pride.
There may be strong desires to significantly
change everyday life, such as a career change, a marriage change, expensive
purchases, or physical appearance. Some people have huge desires for intimate or sexual affairs,
or to feel in love again.
What do you really want? And, if possible, how can
you get what you really want? Here are some steps that
may help you manage a middle-life crisis:
Solutions for Negative Emotions
Some people relive earlier disappointments again and again, dwelling on how they should
have made different decisions. We help people deal with:
- Anger: aggression, rage, frustration, blame,
lack of interest; low-self-esteem; thoughts of
- Dissociated: feeling empty, lost, aware of missing qualities or skills
- Sadness; loneliness; frequent crying; mood swings; feeling
- Conflict: mood swings, volatile changing emotions,
- Fear: anxiety,
panic attacks; fears and/or phobias; social fears, shyness
Solutions for Middle Age Behaviors
Avoid withdrawing into isolation. We can help you be assertive without
being perfectionist. Manage any hyperactive and irritable reactions.
Avoid aggressive or self-harm. Let your lower sex drive
lead to increased intimacy ... rather than to
All my life I loved women.
Nothing was better than the chase. When that excitement
began to fade, I felt empty. You helped
me sort out my sex addiction, solve
relationship problems and begin worthwhile projects. New York
We can help you deal
with the emotional turmoil
and mental chaos
often called a mid-life crisis.
Online Coaching, Counseling & Soulwork Therapy
I thought you were just
another therapist - but you were not just. Not even. Not only.
Plagiarism is theft.
Copyright © Martyn Carruthers 2007-2018
All rights reserved