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Emotional Issues
Addictions
Anger & Rage
Anxiety
Dependence
Depression

Dissociation
Eating Problems
Emotional Maturity
Grief & Loss
Immaturity
Inner Child

Pain Control
Sadness
Stress Relief

Toxic Beliefs
Trauma & Stress
Weight Loss

 

Relationship Problems
Abuse
Affairs

Codependence
Dissolve Conflicts
Divorce
Emotional Blackmail

Enjoy Partnership
Evaluate Partners
Long-Distance Love
Love & Hate

Partnership
Past Partners
Premarital
Rejection
Sexual Issues
Soul Mates

 

Family Challenges
Abuse

Abortion
Adoption
Ancestors
Brothers & Sisters
Divorce & Children
Emotional Incest
Family Meetings
Family Secrets

Fathers & Daughters
Fathers & Sons
Learning Disorders
Mothers & Daughters
Mothers & Sons

Parental Alienation

 

Life Lessons
Authority
Bad Habits
Being Alone
Children's Challenges
Communication
Observing Feelings

Patterns in Love
Personal Growth
Quantum Leap
Self Esteem
Self Improvement
Self Intimacy
Stress & Relaxing
Therapist and Clients

 

Specialties
Chaos Coaching

Inner Conflict
Consciousness
Expert Modeling
Leadership
Learning Disorders
Mentorship

Psychobiology
Sexual Abuse
Soul of Soulwork
Systemic Management
Therapist Abuse
Training Abuse

 

 

Interview with Martyn
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Systemic Coaching & Family Therapy
Solutions for Family Problems Martyn Carruthers

Online Life Coaching, Counseling & Soulwork Therapy


Are you entangled in family relationships and painful emotions?
Do you suffer from your parents' drama or your partner's moods?
We can help you untangle your relationships ... and your life.

Most people have experiences which they never want to experience again. Yet many people tell us that they repeat these experiences. What do they need to learn?

Limiting beliefs and bad habits are common blocks to life goals, and often reflect relationship problems, childhood drama and ancestral bonds. We help people challenge unwanted beliefs and change unwanted habits. Our work is complete when adult family members can define both their goals, and they can plan appropriate steps to achieve those goals without further help.

Our family coaching is usually short-term and goal-oriented; with a focus on resolving specific relationship problems such as learning difficulties, relocation or bereavement.

As we perceive families as living organisms, we evaluate people in terms of their roles and responsibilities within their families. We coach people to understand, redesign and change their family relationship dynamics - we do not try to "fix" people.

Our Approach

In dysfunctional families, unhealthy behavior is normal!

Our approach integrates earlier approaches while stepping onto new ground. We offer the convenience of an overall sequence that is both simple and profoundly deep. Utilizing our home-grown model of rapid relationship diagnosis, we combine experiential mini-interventions reminiscent of the Gestalt approach.

Our work reflects elements of Virginia Satir's questioning, Gregory Bateson's research with psychosis, Bert Hellinger's Family Constellations, Frank Farelly's Provocative Therapy and Victor Frankl's Logotherapy - in a solution-focused frame.

Our work differs from other approaches. We focus on goalwork, integrity and relationship ecology. We use our unique systemic psychology as a basis to rapidly dissolve transferences, identity loss, bonds and abuse. We help people experience integrity as a basis for changing toxic relationships.

Relationship Diagnosis . Emotional Maturity . Family Coaching

Goalwork

Goalwork may sound easy. We ask you simple questions and pay attention to both your verbal and nonverbal responses. Consider the question What do you want?, and :

  • What is your life purpose?
  • What makes sense in your life?
  • How will you know that you are fulfilling your life purpose?

Individual goalwork is not only essential important, it is good practice for the more complex work of counseling couples, families and teams. Systemic goals are usually more complex than individual goals and require high quality goal definition.

We help people use their desires to create a path to discover and experience their deepest selves! This experience of self or integrity, that we sometimes call Soul, can be a basis for living a meaningful life.

Integrity

Integrity, in our systemic psychology, can be described as an transcendent experience of integration and connectedness. Experiences of integrity are a primary systemic goal, as these experiences help enable a rapid dissolution of unwanted trauma, bonds and transferences.

  • Incomplete trauma resolution may precipitate relationship problems
  • Relationship bonds represent beliefs that compel compliant behavior
  • For us, transferences are forms of mistaken identity that trigger inappropriate motivations

Our systems work is primarily for motivated and responsible adults who want to consider the benefits and consequences of actions or lack of action - and then make decisions followed by action.

Evaluate Your Relationships

This table may help you assess family situations. While it seems easy to blame a family member who appears to cause problems, when we look at entire families, we often see a different picture.

Apparently problematic family members often carry family burdens ... most commonly the parents' refusal or inability to deal with their own issues. The consequences of this refusal can be horrible for the adult children.

Healthy Families Families in Trouble
Family members show appreciation and gratitude to each other At least one member is often dissociated, irritated, depressed or critical
Family members respond to most verbal and nonverbal communications At least one member ignores, avoids or shortens most communications
Family members review events in their history They rarely review their relationship history
Family members greet after time apart and ask about each other's activities and other news At least one member rarely interacts with the others, without even silent intimacy
Family members enjoy meeting each other's needs for passion, intimacy and commitment At least one member ignores or criticizes other member's goals and needs
Family members share goals and dreams, shared values and shared meanings. At least one member avoids sharing goals, values or dreams
Family members share meals and housework together At least one member prefers to cook or eat alone
Family members often meet or go out together At least one member generally avoids the others and does things alone
Family members create events or projects which require committed cooperation At least one member avoids or ignores family events and projects
Family members enjoy sharing life events and family happiness At least one member wants to leave but cannot because of guilt, fear or other constraints
Family members respect most of each other's choices, and politely discuss differences At least one member shows contempt for the others' decisions or demands changes
Family members want happiness together At least one member prefers to avoid the others

Family Coaching

In phase 1 we offer people a series of choices, and help them make informed decisions. We discuss the likely consequences of those choices, based on our experience and knowledge. Each person chooses their own solutions.

During phase 2 of our systemic work, each member of the family is offered choices for how to continue. The resulting discussion allows a family to formulate their unique solutions to manage their problems and to reach their goals.

Phase 3 of our family counseling allows each member of a family system to evaluate and change the structure of family and external relationships.

Contact us to evaluate where you are now, where you want to be
and how to get from here to there.

Online Life Coaching, Relationship Counseling & Systemic Therapy

I thought you were just another therapist - but you were not just. Not even. Not only.

Plagiarism is theft. Copyright Martyn Carruthers 2005-2017 All rights reserved


If you like our work, please link to us. If you know someone who might benefit,
please mention www.SystemicPsychology.com or www.EmotionsRelationships.com

Email us at: europecoach@gmail.com

Soulwork systemic coaching in America & Hawaii

 

Soulwork systemic coaching in England, Wales & Scotland

 
Soulwork systemic coaching in Croatia & Serbia
 

Soulwork systemic coaching in Poland

 

 

Have You Suffered Enough?

 Where are you now? Understand your emotions, fixations and enmeshments
What do you hope for? Know your goals and stop sabotaging yourself
Do you feel resourceful? Learn to develop your inner resources
Do your emotions block you? Resolve relationship problems and mentor damage
Do your beliefs limit you? Change limiting beliefs and end dependence
Do you feel connected? Resolve identity issues to recover lost resources
Is your partner happy? Build healthy partnership (or separate peacefully)
Are your children healthy? Happy parents better manage family problems
Do you want team success? Team leaders and their teams develop together
Do you have complex goals? Specialty coaching, counseling & therapy

Plagiarism is theft. Copyright Martyn Carruthers 1996-2017 All rights reserved. Soulwork Systemic Coaching was primarily developed by Martyn Carruthers to help people solve emotional problems and relationship conflicts to achieve their goals. These concepts and strategies are for general knowledge only. Consult a physician about medical conditions and before changing medical treatment. Don't steal intellectual property ... get permission to post, publish or teach Martyn's work - email europecoach@gmail.com