Did you think that you left your parents'
influence behind you when you grew up?
Most people seem to choose
partners that are like their Moms or Dads.
We can help you change your relationship habits.
Escape the parent trap and change your beliefs!
We can help you untangle your lives and end self-sabotage.
Is Your Partnership Under Attack?
You become a true couple when you stand together
before a community
and declare your commitment. A wedding
ceremony symbolizes that commitment.
You are surrounded by toxic role models on TV and at the cinema.
The lyrics of love music often sing of symbiosis, dependence and
codependence. Advertisements try to persuade you that your happiness requires
their products. The result? How many couples do you know who enjoy happy partnership?
Some companies make huge profits by selling short-term distractions. Politicians and cult members may try to persuade
you that you can only be happy if you support their their philosophy.
Your independence and happiness may not support them.
Immature people have a special word for healthy partnership ... they
call it boring! Immature people often prefer drama to health,
distraction to peace, and short-term fun to lasting happiness. If you
grew up in a family where drama and distraction were normal, you may be
unable to enjoy committed partnership and parenthood.
Drug dealers do not prosper when their customers are healthy.
They must convince you that you have a drug deficiency or wait for
you to feel sick! But they don't have to wait long -
most diseases are consequences of unhealthy lifestyles and unhappy
relationships. Unhealthy has become normal!
If you try to create your marriage or partnership
based on the role models offered by TV, movies etc, you will probably
suffer problems until you find yourself choosing between
separation or couple coaching.
Only after you have suffered from partnership problems,
are you likely to seek our couple coaching.
Real partners have real conflicts. Are
you having problems with your marriage or partnership? Should you
seek a marriage counselor or a relationship coach? Marriage
counseling and couple coaching are not the same. Your choice may
reflect the state of your partnership and the emotional
state of you and your partner.
We can help you define your goals, explore blocks to those goals and change them during intensive sessions. Our coaching is often a
better fit for couples who have busy work and family lives.
Marriage counseling can help you solve problems
and understand your emotions. Our coaching can help you manage
relationship bonds and identity loss; and
improve your partnership skills. We want you and your partner to enjoy happy and
People who work or live together will have
conflicts! And people can learn to resolve conflicts about goals, about
what is good for children, about past trauma, betrayal, lost trust, lost
intimacy, diseases, disabilities and relationships with important people,
such as a partner's family.
Conflicts will happen, and most can be resolved. Rather than hiding
conflicts and hoping that they will go away, we coach people to resolve
most internal and external conflicts, by dissolving the
emotional basis of conflicts (entanglements,
relationship bonds and trauma).
Hidden Emotions & Identity Loss
Do you or your partner hide conflicts and emotions? Do you pretend that you feel OK? Do you try to avoid
breaking up your family over your suffering? Are you
depressed, hiding your pain, hiding your fears, sadness and anger ...
hiding much of who you are?
Do you feel like some parts of you have disappeared,
and you don't know how to bring them back? Sooner or later
your emotions will make you sick?
Marriage counselors can offer practical advice
and help you understand your issues. But many problems have emotional
roots. Partners disappointed by betrayal may not recover until the trauma
is managed and trust is rebuilt.
We do not advise people to fight their own emotions, rather we
coach people to solve relationship conflicts, exchanging unpleasant
emotions disappear for a dynamic sense of
life. An alternative is to accept
counterfeit love or turn to medication.
We can coach partners to find and build a "Together Vision". We help partners
discuss difficult topics while respecting each other.
We coach people to manage blocks, and manage emotions. We coach people to live with integrity. Couple coaching works.
Most couples, even with horrendous situations, can build a happy partnership -
if they decide that they both want happiness and are willing to work
toward it. It may not be easy. It's almost always possible. We can
help you achieve it.
- Do you both want a stable, happy partnership?
- Can you both commit to achieving your shared goal?
- Are you both willing to explore how to create
Couple Coaching or Marriage Counseling?
Couple coaching and marriage counseling attract people
with different needs. Couple coaching is for people who want to
change destructive habits, while marriage counseling may be better for people
who want to understand their problems.
Good advice can be wonderful if you are in crisis
with few resources and social problems. Good advice may help you feel
better, at least for a while. But advice rarely changes habits. It is
easy to advise you, for example, to "be brave" when you are
suffering from sexual or physical abuse.
Good advice may not help if you feel overwhelmed by
emotions, such as anger, fear or sadness, if your communication
is poor or if either of you feels under duress.
The best of intentions, prayer and
esoteric advice will likely have temporary
results. Short-term results lead to disappointment and mentor damage;
you may decide that all helping professionals are
manipulative, immature or liars.
Our Couple Coaching
- is based on logic
- focuses on good advice
- concentrates on changing behavior
- concentrates on changing specific actions
- supports action which follow societal beliefs
- is based on integrity
- focuses on sense of life
- concentrates on partnership goals
- concentrates on changing family habits
- supports the happiness of a couple
We can support your
individual growth and self-development. Are you willing to build to develop your partnership maturity?
allow yourself to be happy?
Happy people may not have everything; yet they
make the most of everything.
Happiness seems reserved for those who can love, appropriately
and in full measure;
for those who want to appreciate and encourage other people in their lives.
Online Couple Coaching, Counseling & Soulwork Therapy
I thought you were just
another therapist - but you were not just. Not even. Not only.
Plagiarism is theft. Copyright
© Martyn Carruthers 2007-2018
All rights reserved.