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Emotional Issues
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Pain Control
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Get the Most from our Coaching & Training
Are you ready to get what you want? © Martyn Carruthers

Online Life Coaching, Counseling & Systemic Therapy

Do you want to resolve difficult relationships or painful emotions?
We can coach you to untangle your life ... and reclaim your freedom.
We also mentor helping professionals to work with relationship issues.

Getting Ready to Change

We help people define what they want and get it! We coach people to clarify relationships, resolve emotional problems and end self-sabotage. We help people change limiting beliefs and find lasting relief from emotional trauma and relationship problems. We help people understand themselves.

Amazing - it was like you threw a switch and I started to understand my crazy family.

Many helping professionals seem to specialize in their own issues. They may feel entangled with their clients' histories, and try to build parental or symbiotic relationships with them. We help people unhook from toxic relationships and heal mentor damage. See our Coaching Philosophy here.

Do you want coaching or therapy? I adapted this table from Therapist as Life Coach: Transforming Your Practice by Dr. Patrick Williams, Ed.D, MCC.

Coaching Psychotherapy
For healthy people who desire better situations For patients with identifiable dysfunctions
Deals mostly with a personís goals and blocks and seeks to help people Deals mostly with patients' past trauma, and seeks to heal patients
Helps people learn or improve skills to build mature, satisfying relationships and to achieve goals Helps patients manage old pain and suffering
Co-creative equal partnership (coaches help people explore their blocks and solve their problems) Doctor-patient relationship (therapists provide patients with diagnosis and interventions)
Emotions are perceived as natural and normal Emotions are perceived as unnatural and abnormal
Growth and progress are often rapid and enjoyable Growth and progress are often slow and painful
A coach helps people identify their goals and blocks, then walks with them to success, holding people accountable for reaching their own goals. A therapist provides patients with professional expertise and guidelines to diagnose problems and provide patients with a path to healing.

Our coaching and training is to help you manage your complaints and reach your goals by cooperating together. We often offer homework between sessions to help you coach, train or mentor yourself.

To accelerate your progress, first - dare to dream. Then you can ...

  1. Consider what you really want. If you want to work on one issue, it should be important - especially if it is something that helps you fulfill significant goals or prevent self-sabotage. E.g. I want to replace my chronic anger with a sense of peace so that ...

  2. Describe what you want as clearly as you can. E.g., if your goal is a happy family, do you know what a real happy family would look, sound and feel like? Write down your thoughts.

  3. Take responsibility for your life. We can help you define your dreams, and find ways to make them reality. We can encourage and support you as you make your dreams come true.

  4. Reach for your own goals. We help people take action. If you want someone else to change ... consider how you can motivate that other person to act in the way that you prefer.

  5. Clarify what you want. We often ask unusual questions to expose important insights, and we may make unreasonable requests to motivate you to look beyond your limits.

    Our questions help us ask better questions.
    Your answers help you create better answers.

  6. Focus on the future. We probably don't need to know details of your history. Your future success is probably much more important to us (and to you) than your past disappointments.

  7. Prepare - help us work together towards your future and your goals ... fill out a background form (below) as much as you can feel comfortable with and e-mail it to us.

  8. Review each session with us. Consider what you learn from each session, and what we may be able to accomplish during our next meeting.

  9. Feedback - please let us know what is of most value to you. Let us know what works and what you find less useful.

  10. Breakthrough = Insight + Action! Insight without action is like a kiss on the cheek; it's briefly interesting but rarely inspirational. Use your insights to inspire action!

How many sessions do you need? This depends on how realistic you are, how many issues you want to manage, your maturity, your relationships, your health, your benefits for staying stuck, how hard you work and on how much you want to chat.

If you want to resolve emotional and relationship blocks ... contact us.

Online Coaching, Counseling & Soulwork Therapy

I thought you were just another therapist - but you were not just. Not even. Not only.

Plagiarism is theft. Copyright © Martyn Carruthers 2006-2018
All rights reserved.

If you like our work, please link to us. If you know someone who might benefit,
please mention or

For online help, email us at:

Soulwork systemic coaching in America & Hawaii


Soulwork systemic coaching in England, Wales & Scotland

Soulwork systemic coaching in Croatia & Serbia

Soulwork systemic coaching in Poland



Have You Suffered Enough?

 Where are you now? Understand your emotions, fixations and enmeshments
What do you hope for? Know your goals and stop sabotaging yourself
Do you feel resourceful? Learn to develop your inner resources
Do emotions block you? Relationship problems and mentor damage
Do your beliefs limit you? Change limiting beliefs and end dependence
Do you feel connected? Resolve identity issues to recover lost resources
Is your partner happy? Build healthy partnership (or separate peacefully)
Are your children healthy? Happy parents better manage family problems
Do you want team success? Team leaders and their teams develop together
Do you have complex goals? Specialty coaching, counseling & therapy

Plagiarism is theft. Copyright © Martyn Carruthers 1996-2018  All rights reserved. Soulwork Systemic Coaching was primarily developed by Martyn Carruthers to help people solve emotional problems and relationship conflicts to achieve their goals. These concepts and strategies are for general knowledge only. Consult a physician about medical conditions and before changing medical treatment. Don't steal intellectual property ... get permission to post, publish or teach Martyn's work - email